So Wrong
by ChoCedric
Summary: Cho Chang is kissing Harry Potter, and it feels so wrong, so wrong to lock her lips with his when it's Cedric's lips she should be kissing. He smells all wrong, too, and he's too short and too skinny. This is just not right.


Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

So Wrong

By: ChoCedric

Cho Chang is kissing Harry Potter, and the whole time, tears are pouring down her face. It feels so wrong, so wrong, to be kissing him, because it really should be Cedric's lips hers should be meeting. All her friends told her she had to move on, and that Harry Potter is a great bloke, so she's trying to take their advice. She thought she could receive comfort from him to help her get over Cedric, but she's finding it extremely difficult.

She remembers back to those beautiful days when the love of her life was alive. She remembers holding his hand, and their first kiss under the mistletoe at the Yule Ball. His lips were soft and warm, the perfect texture. She recalls how he wrapped his arms around her and she felt so protected in his love. Nothing could go wrong as long as he was around. He whispered words of adoration in her ear, and she remembers the scent of him, the scent of cologne and love.

Their six-month courtship was amazing and completely magical. She felt so high, on cloud nine, on top of the world. He brought her to places where she could figuratively fly, and he completely understood all of her woes and worries and always wiped her tears away whenever she cried. But the problems she had then are so insignificant to the problems she has now; living without Cedric is a nightmare from hell.

She stares at Harry, and his eyes are green instead of the gray ones she loved so much. The last time she looked into Cedric's gray eyes, they were blank and lifeless, staring straight ahead. It hurts to look into Harry's now, and he doesn't even try to give her comfort. He gazes at her with a dumbfounded expression, like he doesn't know what on Earth he is supposed to do. The scent's all wrong, too; he doesn't smell like Cedric. And his lips feel different from Cedric's, not the right texture, and he is too short, way too short, and also too skinny.

Cho remembers the last time she kissed Cedric's lips. They were icy cold, when she went to visit him in the hospital wing the day after his death. He didn't respond to her loving caresses and kisses; he just lay there stone cold. The scent of him still lingered on his skin, taunting her, making her almost believe he was still alive. But he was like a marble statue, and she knew that she'd never, ever be the same happy girl again.

Umbridge is being a totally insensitive fool, totally misunderstanding her grief. She joined Dumbledore's Army because she wanted to do anything to avenge her love. She knew as soon as she looked into Cedric's eyes that it hadn't been an accident that killed him; the look of shock and fear was too prominent. Only a heartless murderer could take the life and love out of his beautiful gray eyes in such a fashion. As she continues to kiss Harry, the scent of him almost makes her ill.

As the rest of the year passes, she's never able to forget that kiss and how wrong it felt. She knows that falling in love again will be an impossibility for her; whenever she would go to lock lips with another boy, it would be Cedric she'd see. The image of his lifeless eyes permeates her mind wherever she goes, and whenever she sees Harry Potter, she can't help but blame him a little for taking Cedric away from her, for if he hadn't suggested that they take the cup together, her love would still be safe and alive, in her arms.

When Cho asks him to go out on Valentine's Day, she had no idea that things could go so terribly awry. Hogsmeade with Cedric was full of laughter and love, while Hogsmeade with Harry is uncomfortable and dull. She takes him into Madame Puddifoot's, trying to remember the good times with Cedric, but it only causes her grief to resurface again. When she tries to ask him how he died, he changes the subject! All she wants to know is whether he suffered, whether he was in pain, whether he said anything before he was mercilessly struck down, eliminated like an insect. But Harry obviously doesn't want to discuss it.

Cho often thinks back on that day, and again, she felt the wrongness of it, just like she felt how wrong the kiss was after the DA meeting that day. Her heart is totally smashed, broken, and the only time she is happy now is in her dreams, when Cedric comes back to her. But she wakes up to the same dreadful reality every morning, and it's like a hard, ringing slap to the face.

So Cho goes on, feeling as though her life is entirely loveless. When Marietta betrays the DA, Cho is angry with her, but at the same time, she forgives her because Marietta was the only one who still stayed with her through this past year. It only took Cedric to die for her popularity to totally go down the tubes. Just because she lost her boyfriend all her other friends decided to desert the depressed teenager. How would they feel, she thinks viciously, if they saw their soulmate's lifeless eyes staring at a wailing, weeping crowd? And then to try and move on, to try to seek comfort from the only other witness, and being totally turned away?

Things are never the same with Harry Potter after that. Cho finishes her schooling, totally ignoring him. He can go do what he likes with the Weasley girl, she thinks to herself. It tears up her heart to see him so happy, arm in arm with Ginny. It brings back memories of her being arm in arm with Cedric, and she still can't get past the fact that her beautiful romance is never coming back. It was so wrong to kiss Harry, so wrong to try to lock her lips with anyone else's, for no one can ever replace the massive hole in her heart where love used to be.


End file.
